#don't worry I'm gonna try and post more often in future

[nyctophobia-au]

I just come back here to post shitposts, I stg.

Auric and Grimm breakup summary in a nutshell.

[beneathsilverstars]

been doing research on writing plural systems for sif+loop in mundane modern aus, and i think i've got a solid idea of what i want to do! specifics may vary by au but i wanted a base set of headcanons to vary from, so sif+loop being a system can be a background fact of my au musings instead of something i have to reinvent every time.

(i'm a singlet so if any systems have concrit or thoughts they want to share i'd be happy to hear it! i'm not like planning a fic or anything currently, but it's still nice to not be working off of misconceptions for my silly little posts.)

siffrin took over as the main host in their late teens and doesn't remember anything from before that. in their early-mid 20s their work/housing situation was horrible and when they couldn't take another day like that, siffrin split into loop (who kept the mid 20s memories, with a new personality) and siffrin take two (who remembers the 17-20 era a bit better, but then there's a big gap). between the two of them they were able to cope better and hold a not-as-awful job and get a shitty apartment all to themselves!

siffrin fronts more often on average, because they're better at quietly accomplishing day-to-day tasks. but if he gets too overwhelmed or anxious (think their mini loop-backs in canon) then loop takes over, bc loop dgaf about some of the things siffrin worries about, and doesn't shut down as easily. but since they don't bottle up their feelings as severely, they're more likely to react outwardly and make rash choices like quitting their job, being rude, splurging on little treats, etc. so that's why siffrin is the default fronter for things like work and chores, when he's feeling up to it.

loop is fairly aware of what's going on while siffrin is fronting - sometimes they choose to tune more of it out, but they can catch most of it if they want to, and sometimes siffrin will talk to them or nudge them to pay attention. since they know at least the basics of what siffrin was up to, they can usually step in pretty smoothly when they need to take over! and it's very easy for them to take over, with or without siffrin's say-so, though they try to ask if it's not an emergency (and if it is an emergency, siffrin is likely trying to back away from the front anyway).

when loop is fronting, though, siffrin is entirely away, dreaming in the void. loop can nudge them for a vague opinion or relevant memory, but they can't hold a full conversation and they're not aware of what loop's doing. when loop puts them in the front again they're usually disoriented and need a moment for loop to tell them what's been happening. and again, loop is the one deciding to switch; sometimes siffrin might resist getting pulled back if they're still feeling bad, or get antsy and start reaching out if they've been asleep a while or are having bad dreams, but they're not gonna react to environmental situations since they're not aware of them.

mal is in there too but doesn't front. its role is to be socially hyper-vigilant, pointing out when other people might be upset at them so the alter who's fronting knows to fix it or avoid the person. it's been around longer than siffrin, and was helpful way back then, but now that siffrin and loop have worked out an effective balance and are fairly safe, mal's behavior is somewhat maladaptive (ha!). it's not super directly aware of the outside world like loop is, not anymore at least, but it does get secondhand memories from both siffrin and loop. it actually sometimes remembers facts and details that sif and loop both quickly forgot, because maybe those details will end up relevant to spotting and avoiding future problems - but since it got the memories secondhand and filtered them through a particularly paranoid worldview, it's likely to misremember subjective interpretations as literal truth, so you gotta take its claims with a grain of salt.

it mostly hangs out in the void imagining fractals and whatnot these days, keeping an eye on siffrin while they sleep. it occasionally perks up and chimes in with its pessimistic point of view when siffrin is really upset - it can communicate better with sleeping siffrin than loop can. loop is not on speaking terms with it because they're mad that it goes behind loop's back and makes siffrin more upset right when loop is trying to shield him from the upsetting situation. but siffrin doesn't mind it bc it's just trying to help in its own way, and sometimes it is helpful to face their fears in plain words instead of avoiding them. and siffrin will sometimes ask it for help with like, puzzles, because it's good at pattern recognition.

there's also a no-longer-quite-dormant alter that presumably fronted for much of the body's childhood. they don't hang out in siffrin and mal's void, and they don't talk to anyone else within the system. but now that the system is more safe and stable, every once in a while something will catch their attention and they'll gently push to the front and start talking. as soon as their train of thought is interrupted they're gone again, and the other alters don't even remember that they got usurped for a moment, a la siffrin's bits of telling childhood anecdotes in canon. loop and siffrin have surmised that they exist, and call them the lost one.

mal has also implied that there's at least one more dormant alter, but it's from before siffrin-and-loop's time and possibly mal's as well.

if something happens that's so distressing that siffrin retreats into headspace and loop won't take over either, the body goes into dissociated autopilot. it will follow basic one-step instructions (such as "follow me" or "eat this"), speak in a couple simple scripts (such as answering "how are you" with "i'm fine"), and complete rote tasks such as taking a familiar route home from work or going to bed. loop doesn't pay much attention because that would defeat the point / put them back in front, so they usually have very little if any idea of what happened in this state, but it is possible for outside events to catch their attention enough for them to try fronting again. otherwise they'll be back next time the body wakes up. siffrin, on the other hand, usually won't front for at least a day or two after this happens, and will likely have forgotten the events leading up to it as well.

it doesn't happen very often since it's the very last resort, after siffrin dissociating, loop taking over, and loop dissociating. loop and siffrin don't consider the autopilot an alter because it doesn't form memories, have emotions or opinions, or interact in the headspace; it just follows where it's led, by habit or outside influence. loop has argued in favor of trying to imbue it with more personhood so it's less uncanny for other people to interact with and can get loop's attention when the distressing thing is over, but siffrin argues that if it can think that defeats the point, and they'd just end up with this new alter and a new autopilot.

past all that, the specifics will depend on the exact au; particularly the ratio of loop time to siffrin time will depend on how much siffrin works and how awful their job is, whether siffrin and/or loop have friends yet, etc. but i think when they're doing pretty well they'd be happy with siffrin doing work/chores and most of the activities that they both enjoy (since then they'll both remember it), and loop fronting for maybe a third of their free time to do their own thing, and maybe here and there if something goes wrong at work. and then if siffrin starts feeling burnt out, they swap for a couple days of loop doing most things and siffrin just coming out for an hour or two. siffrin and mal probably talk maybe a couple times a month, unless siffrin is really going through it, in which case they might talk a lot for a couple days. it also might be possible for mal to eventually adapt a little more to being safe, and start providing a wider range of possible interpretations instead of just the worst case scenario.

ok that's all! and as i said, i'm totally open to feedback. :3

[hms-no-fun]

What's your opinion on the new HS^2 update? I'm really excited it's back but I'm a little worried. Like, the fandom has had a real problem with pretending all the horrible shit that caused it to end in the first place never happened. Is this just gonna sweep that under the rug even more? Is James Roach heading the project because he's less "problematic"? I love James roach and I'm sure he'll do great but what about all the transphobia? I just hope they finally fulfill the Toblerone Prophesy and make June Egbert cannon.

short version is, i'm cautiously optimistic! but this is a loaded question you've given me on a lot of fronts, so i'm gonna try to take it piece by piece.

to start with, the sudden revival of Homestuck^2 (now minus the squared) took me by surprise because to my knowledge, it was entirely dead in the water. my involvement with anything Official ended at Pesterquest, and pretty much the entire post-canon crew i was friends with in 2019-20 has moved on to greener pastures. i share a similar sentiment with @pochapal in that i would have put money on hs2 staying dead forever. i have, quite frankly, dreaded the inevitable day when official Homestuck media would resume production, because the fandom at large seems quite eager to sweep the ceaseless harassment and transphobia that ended hs2 under the rug and pretend that it just, like you said... never happened. when that california cafe used older Pesterquest-like character designs that omitted short chubby Terezi and black-coded Roxy, however well-intentioned and ultimately harmless that was, it felt like a sign of things to come. that, as you fear, the sharper & more personal queerness that we tried to bring to this series would be erased, in favor of something meant to simultaneously appease both tenderqueers and redditors, two sects of the fandom most responsible for the aforementioned harassment.

luckily, that really doesn't seem to be the case!

to your worry that James Roach was made director because he's "less problematic," i'll just say that's entirely the wrong way to look at it. it's not like WP (such that it even still exists) were cruising to get HS2 back up and running. by all accounts, James is the only reason it's happening again in the first place. i can't stress enough just how small an operation this Homestuck business actually is (or, at least, was when i was involved). this is not a Huge Corporation making cynical cash grab decisions. this is someone who cares about the material pushing to get something made where otherwise there would be nothing. check the new About page, where the principles of the so-called Homestuck Independent Creative Union are laid out in plain terms. this is something the original hs2 team fought for, so for this new version to start from there as square one is huge and a good sign of the possible longevity of the project.

next, let's talk about the question of this new team erasing the legacy of the old one. Kate Mitchell is on the record that she was reached out to about this new hs2, approved it, and declined to be involved. i don't know if the other writers were reached out to, but i have no reason to believe they weren't. this is a tremendously important gesture of good faith and goes a long way towards easing some of these worries.

but let's look at the composition of the team itself. do you remember The Perfectly Generic Podcast? originally hosted by future hs2 writer Kate, pgen became a flashpoint for community discourse, often opening doors between official homestuck and homestuck fandom. what made that show special was that, rather than relying on the imo tired genre of the liveread, pgen focused on a different topic each episode and explored it with one or two qualified guests. Kate's goal with the show was to encourage a more adult and quasi-academic discussion of homestuck, of its successes and its failures. if you weren't there, the weight i'm putting on pgen might seem overblown (not least because you can't find it anywhere anymore except on the internet archive). but it's not! when they decisively criticized the wild contents of the Skaianet debacle in episode 19, Andrew listened and worked to bring a more diverse group of creators into the fold. in the months after the Epilogues were released, Andrew issued a statement through pgen on episode 52 about how the Epilogues are meant to create bridges and offramps for the post-canon fandom. it's an essential piece for understanding the epilogues and their relationship to fanworks! that it wasn't included as the author's introduction to the Epilogues in the book version remains to my mind an astonishing oversight, but whatever. point is, pgen mattered to the folks in charge.

so let's look again at the writing staff of this new crew. James Roach first guested on pgen in episode 7, and would go on to be a regular. Haven, who did the Vriska and Roxy sprites in Pesterquest (and probably more stuff i don't remember), guested in episodes 81 and 87. Miles guested on episode 87 as well (unless it's a different Miles, i'm not familiar with their work and ugh this damnable linkrot). Floral, creator of one of my favorite hs fanworks & huge godfeels influence Liminal Space, first guested on pgen in episode 47, and would go on to be a regular (including once during my tenure as host to talk about Jade). on the technical staff side, Kohi built the hs2 website and has remained a backend mainstay both on the WP side and on Vast Error.

all of which is to say, if you were looking for a crew to cynically erase the past and appease the haters, these probably aren't the folks that'd be at the top of your list. of course, if you *really* wanted to cynically erase the past and appease the haters, you wouldn't bother reviving hs2 in the first place!

and that's the crux of the matter here. what cash is there to grab? what clout could possibly be chased? i struggle to think of a decision less obviously profitable and popular than continuing hs2 with a new crew right where it left off. i have to believe this is happening because the people involved want to make it.

so, yeah, i'm cautiously optimistic. i like this crew, i like the contents of the first upd8, and i'm glad as hell it's not a reboot! i'm grateful that by reviving hs2, the hs:bc crew have instantly yanked the epilogues & the post-canon project back into relevance in the broader community. and i always liked hs2 a lot! i was excited to see where they were going! i'm really looking forward to seeing more YIFFY!!!!!

but the thing is, this won't be the hs2 i wanted. i know that, and i'm not expecting it. my greatest hope for hs:bc, for this crew, is that they get the chance to take up the reins and drive this thing in whatever direction they feel most passionate about. if that winds up looking like the hs2 that was originally planned, great-- but more than anything, i want everyone on this team to feel just as empowered to leave a profound and personal mark on this series as the original team did, as i did working on Pesterquest. i hope the outline changes! i hope they take some really wild swings! i want to be surprised!! i want to be challenged!!!

above all, i want them to have the chance to pick a course, sail it, and see it through to the end regardless of what the public thinks. they deserve the chance that the original crew didn't get.

i have plenty of bitterness and cynicism in my heart over the events and circumstances of 2019-20, but as far as i'm concerned it has no place here today. i would never, ever wish the trauma and stress of that era on anyone. let the fandom at large react in whatever way it will, but i want things to be different this time. this is a second chance-- not just for hs2/hs:bc, but for all of us. even people who hate homestuck post-canon! this is an opportunity for everyone to choose to be better this time, and to push back when others might squander that opportunity. this team is not a group of celebrities, not an abstract fiction on the other side of the world, they are human beings who took a job. they've earned the opportunity to do that job, and they deserve to be treated with the respect and dignity that was so often absent a few years ago.

as to your last point, about june egbert and the toblerone. i've been saying for years that andrew's confirmation of june was less "the granting of a wish" than it was "a spoiler shared without input from the creative team." that there is any doubt about june's providence in hs2 can only be attributed to willful, aggressive ignorance on the part of people who refuse to engage with the written word in any way other than plodding literalism. the original team didn't unveil june ~immediately~ because they didn't think of june as a wish, they thought of her as a character in an ongoing story who needed time to develop naturally. i have never not felt entirely crazy about how thick everyone has been about this!

but will the new team make june canon? obviously i have no way of knowing for sure, but i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that probably the answer is "yes, when they're good and goddamned ready." just, please, for the love of god, don't go after every upd8 like "where's june? where's june? why hasn't june yet????" this was one of the worst results of the toblerone spoiler and it put INSANE pressure on the hs2 team. so just... just let this story be what it is. let this new team make the homestuck continuation they want to make.

and in the meantime, if you're really hungry for june... there's always godfeels :)

[obeyme-and-myfics]

Hi!! May I request a continuation of short!MC with the side characters? I love your writing! 💖💖💖

Yes, of course! I took a little break from posting on the internet so that's why it took so long for me to respond. Also thank you! I try to write as well as I can. (●'◡'●) Some side characters are gonna be missing from this cuz I'm not quite comfortable writing for them yet.

I haven't met Raphael, Mephistopheles or Thirteen(I am planning on making their own parts when I do tho!) in anything other than events. So I'd like to apologize in advance because if I remember correctly one of your favs is Mephisto o(TヘTo) (I hope this doesn't sound weird since we've only met briefly on the discord server /gen)

Anyway onto the actual prompt (￣y▽￣)╭

Part 1| Part 2(here)

Prompt: How Obey Me Characters react to a short MC/Y/N

Characters: Diavolo, Barbatos, Simeon, Solomon, Luke(/p)

Headcanon List

CW/TWs: Teasing for your height,

Diavolo

I don't think he'd have much of a reaction seeing as most people/demons are a lot shorter than him

This man is easily 7ft I don't think he gives a fuck, everyone is puny to him

He'd definitely say something by accident, something he doesn't think would bother you

He's a himbo and oblivious to this shit

He'd probably say some shit like

"You're quite small for a human" or something like that

Crouches/Bends down to talk to you sometimes

Only when he really feels like it

I swear he's not trying to be rude

He'll pick you up only if you ask

For any reason too, he adores his small human

He respects you and doesn't want to help you like that unless you want him to

If he sees you struggling to grab something he'll get it for you

Gently reminds you that he can help you and you don't need to struggle with these things while he's there

Worries about other demons taking advantage of your small stature and hurting you

So he checks in on your wellbeing more often than he would if you were taller

If he knows you're around, he's making sure he doesn't accidentally run over you

I'm so sorry! to be fair he's probably gotta do that with bitches 5'7 and below

He'd probably enjoy holding/hugging you too

Like you ask for cuddles this man is cradling you in his arm

Maybe even rocking your ass to sleep

Barbatos

Man has nothing to say about your height

Like he couldn't care less about it and has the foresight to not say shit if you're a little insecure

Not that he would even if you weren't

If he sees you struggling to get something off a higher place, he's helping even if you don't ask/don't want him to

That's just kinda how he is

If you request he stop that he will but you need to communicate your wants and needs

If he sees you getting bullied(/lh) for your height and you look distressed he'll give to culprit a bit of a scolding

Depending on how bad it/Who it was it'll be harsher

Of course he'd like for you to defend yourself at least a little bit

When you do he can't help but smile a little to himself.

He likes to serve the ones he cares for so if any difficulties arise due to your height he'd be happy to attend to them

That is to say its only if you ask/he has the time to

He is still the butler of the future ruler of the Devildom after all

Barbatos also wouldn't treat you any different than how he would treat some one of average height or taller

Solomon

He makes the occasional comment about your height to your face

Giggles about it in private on occasion LIKE A BITCH

It's only occasionally that he does this tho

Overall its not that big of a deal to him

He's been alive long enough that he doesn't really care

Will absolutely help you with things your height hinders you from doing

If you're being bullied about your height he'll give you a chance to defend yourself before jumping to your defense

Will pick you up and carry you sometimes just for shits and giggles

Other times he picks you up and carries you away to hang out or aid him in another one of his magical endeavors.

and now we have Nightbringer /j

He's not doing anything to talk to you on your level Slay, king Solomon. Slay

He thinks its mildly entertaining to watch you struggle to grab something off the top shelf/anything out of your reach

He's a bit more careful with you than he normally would be with others

Has offhandedly suggested making something to make you taller if you'd like it

you gonna whoop his ass or should I?

He enjoys watching you stand up for yourself despite your height

It can be intimidating when people who are much taller than you pick on you and he understands that

or maybe you're not intimidated in the slightest and just wanted to unleash a can of whoop ass on some assholes who've been picking on you Period. Slay honestly.

He understands that too, and enjoys watching it go down

He finds it satisfying

Simeon

Won't comment on it most of the time but he does think its really cute

Only makes a comment when he's asking if you need help getting something higher up than you can reach

and its normally something like

"Oh! MC did you need help? It looks like you can't quite reach that."

A bit more careful with you than he would be normally

Though he's gentle by nature most of the time Sadistic Simeon has me in a chokehold fr fr

He won't get down to your level or do anything to demean you

not intentionally anyway

He doesn't say anything about your height for the most part but he will slip up every once in a while

It's nothing bad he just lets it slip he thinks your height is cute

He encourages you to stand up for yourself but has no problem sticking up for you or stealing you away if you're being bullied too much.

Happy to help with anything your height makes difficult when you ask

Other than that he doesn't treat you any differently due to your height

Luke

He's just happy he's not the only short one here.

If you're shorter than him he doesn't comment on it but he is excited to not be the shortest there.

He would make a few comments about it but you just gotta tell him to stop and he will

He doesn't want to make you upset with him

Sweet baby just wants to bond with you over the others making fun of your heights

Doesn't hesitate to yell at anyone making fun of your height and calling you names because of it

Makes sure you're okay afterwards

He's getting made fun of for this though

The brothers would take to calling him your guard dog

He barely gives you a chance to defend yourself but will back up if you defend yourself before he can

He borderline clings to you like a sloth

Comes to you every time he needs to vent about everyone bullying him for his own height

You're his favorite human now

If he's taller than you, he will do his best to help with things you can't reach.

He's happy to help out his friend

[sugar-omi]

I hate myself for thinking this but, what if MC finds out she’s pregnant and the first thing in her mind is that she’s fucking up Cove’s future. So instead of telling him she just breaks up with him and shuts herself away from him so he can’t convince her that they’ll work it out. Now Cove has no clue why the love of his life just broke his poor heart. Skip to five years later, Cove comes back to surprise visit his dad but surprise there’s MC, Cliff and a little five year old boy that looks way too much like Cove. Like I’m talking copy and paste that’s a little Cove

oh my fucking god.... i. pls i have some thoughts but also OUCH. BIG OUCH

mmm i'm not gonna make a full fic/detailed post... maybe later if we're all itching for some angst or i'm up for causing more heart ache n then i am very much open to expanding on this (already thinking abt cove getting to know his son.... omfg my heart HURTS)

but i wonder how MC "gets away" (for lack 'a better words) with not telling cove about the kid.

because i can tell you right now, cliff and kyra can't know about it and keep it a secret. not for 5 years at least.

so does she beg everyone in her family to keep it a secret? i think that's the best bet. moms would really prefer Not to keep it a secret, but they also can't force you to tell cove...

but i also don't see them letting 5 years without cove at least knowing, go by either... they'd try to keep the secret, but seeing cove's sad face would break them quickly, if not instantly.

also your friends!!! god, they can not keep a secrete to save their life, especially that big. so you can tell them, but expect the news to find its way back to cove in about.. mmm... 4 hours? so yeah....

anyway!!! lets say that your family kept the secret...

i think your son would eventually start asking about his dad. he sees how you and your family react to him, hears all the mumbling about how he looks so much like... "cove"? when you think he's in the other room.

and he sees how sometimes you look sad and how you slowly and tenderly run your fingers through his hair. and how sometimes you tell him "yknow, daddy has hair just like yours."

and when he asks why you're sad, if you respond with something along the lines of "you look just like your dad, thats all."

or even if you say that in response when he asks what his dad looks like (if you haven't shown him pictures), or if he overhears you saying he looks like this "cove" guy

you notice he starts looking at himself more often... maybe even asking, "does daddy have green hair like mine?" "are his eyes really blue, just like mine?" "does he wear glasses too?" and still in awe that he and this man he's never met, but already seems to adore him (as much as a toddler can adore someone they don't know), share the same features.

and if you show him pictures of cove, which i hope you do, but if you don't, don't worry because your son will probably realize "he has green hair like me!!!!" and he'd either run up to enthuse about it or run up to ask him if he's his daddy bc they have the same hair color... or just call him daddy n if anyone tries to argue about it, wdym?! they have the same hair color, what more do you need?!

so hopefully, cove is the only man with specifically seafoam green hair. otherwise, you're shitting yourself every time your son runs off to meet his green-haired-brethern

anyway. I think all your sons questions, and seeing pictures, knowing that he shares so many traits with cove, and seeing you miss him.

oh god, seeing you sad would make him insist so so much on seeing cove.

"if we meet daddy, will you be happy again?"

also can't believe I almost forgot.. your son being sad about not having a dad, and being jealous of other kids for spending time with their dad, etc.

he'd ask you questions about why he doesn't have a dad, n if he does. why isn't he around? and a real heartbreaker.. does daddy hate him? does he not love him? is that why he isn't here?

so I guess that means it's time to go back to sunset bird! and finally explain why you moved away n never looked back, and why you don't talk to anyone but your parents from back then...

now I won't get into everything right now (im a fuckin liar. I can feel a tangent coming on)

but I wanna talk abt how cove would feel, just a bit, and how I think your future with him would look...

I think at first, he'd be really shocked, seeing this carbon copy of his much younger self. the only thing telling him that his 4-5 year old self didn't jump out of one of his many childhood pictures,

is any birthmarks or beauty marks that maybe you have, or the boys hair being curlier than his, or his skin tone, or maybe he has your nose. whatever it is, he knows he's looking at the imperfect combination of you and him.

(cove's heart is beating outta his chest right now, n you're lucky he only stumbles instead of fainting, because this really is a shock... but that deeper part inside of him, that egotistical, primal almost, part of his heart swells up at the thought, the reality. that his son looks mostly, if not entirely like him.)

but after shock, he's sad. I think he'd be really sad, because he realizes that this is why you broke up right? and no matter how in control of your emotions you think you may be, your wide eyes show how afraid, nervous, and sad you are. he knows. he knows without even talking to you and it hurts

and after he gets past the anger and confusion stage, maybe even in between in fact- which would be more natural since, I think he'd feel this all at once but that's besides the point

he'd be really sad he missed all his sons milestones. walking, first words... God he probably dreams about it (when he does eventually fall asleep), and now his heart is tugging at the seams and the seams are RIPPING.

he also starts thinking about how hard it must've been doing it by yourself. and going through all that without him, your partner.

but maybe you didn't rely on him like he relied on you? maybe you didn't trust him like he did you, maybe you just... didn't need him. like he needed you.

you did break up afterall, and you never let him know about the kid until now, so maybe you thought he'd be a failure of a father and nipped it in the bud before disaster struck...

but I also think that's where anger comes in. because you didn't tell him. he didn't have a choice at all.

he knows he had a tendency to hesitate or run away, but he thinks really hard about it, and he knows he wouldn't have ran away from this.

leaving you alone would scare him a lot more than being a father. being a bad or absent father would scare him a lot more than trying to be a good one. knowingly abandoning a life he helped create, would scare him so much more. he wouldn't be able to sleep otherwise.

so while he gets it. he doesn't get why you didn't try.

and if you explain that you worried about ruining his future, he's so upset and so mad because how could you make that choice for him? how could you take on the burden alone?

this is also where confusion merges in, because while the answers are so obvious or easy to guess, he just can't believe it. he doesn't wanna believe it...

now about your future...

cove still loves you. he's loved you his whole life, it's hard to stop even 5 years later... and seeing you, it makes his heart throb because he's dreamed about this for many nights.

you broke up with him without giving any answers. you even up and moved by the end of the week so when he tried to give you space, before talking to you, it was too late. your room was pretty much void of every sign of life.

you took all your treasured items, your clothes- spare some youd been meaning to get rid of, your pictures, your hobby items. everything. he's surprised you didn't just take the bed and frame.

he's surprised you didn't just carve out his heart n take it with you, because if it's still in his chest, why does it feel so hollow?...

it'd take a really long time to even think of a romantic relationship. if at all. maybe cove's even accepted the break up at some point, depending on how long you'd been together. but if you'd been together since you were 13, it's a hard pill to swallow. bc you can put up with his angsty teenage self, what changed...?

I think seeing you be a parent, and so adored by your son, warms up his heart. makes him fall in love a bit at the sight.

it's not instant, he's getting to know you again. and getting to know this life that he didn't even know was waiting for him.

it's a good 2 or 3 years of figuring out this mess until it becomes something that makes sense. or as much sense as it can make. and if there's still something there, no matter how miniscule. it will catch fire.

now about the kiddo... he's so scared. and I hope you took a few days of talking with cove, and prbly cliff n Kyra bc they have a lotta feelings n thoughts on this too, before you try to integrate cove into his life.

it's small. cove meeting you at the park, and either your son is asking cove a billion questions (both abt why the sky is blue, and awkward questions abt why he wasn't present before...)

or he's trying to drag him on the monkey bars (doesn't work, cove's feet are on the ground still....)

or he's sitting silently on the blanket, reading, occasionally showing cove his favorite scene of the picture book or making him pronounce a word

but it does get bigger, it becomes lunch-n-movie dates, spending the night at your house (at your son's insistence. prbly bc he didn't want him to leave after a fun day), then cove taking him out alone..

it's a lot. and sometimes it feels like you're going backwards or that you're not moving at all because it's hard, for awhile. and even though his dad is on speed dial, there's not enough information he can give cove in how to take care of and deal with a kid he just met a few months ago.

especially a kid who already has a bit of personality, is hell on wheels (like most 5 year olds), possibly has many questions n sometimes problems with cove suddenly being here... it's a lot. n cliff can't help with any of it really.

he does get comfortable, eventually. although there's still times when he's sad, sometimes even angry about what happened, and all he's missed out on, he's so so happy to not miss out on anything else.

[what0smart]

Absolute Power:Superson thoughts!!!

Spoilers!!!!!!

As much as I would love to make an essay on this I don't think there's any way I could organize my thoughts enough for it to be good so I'm just gonna list out my thoughts on my favorite parts!

You can find my thoughts on the first 8 pages we got as previews here (page posting limit lol)

Nia understanding that while Jon often fights alone or for people, he desperately wants to fight alongside others or for them to fight for him.

This whole page is so great, I love the direct acknowledgement that Jon has been constantly fighting and all the times he had to fight alone. I will take the volcano and Ultraman where and whenever lol

Jon clearly has been suppressing his trauma and his constant fighting to make sure he doesn't lose anything like when he lost everything as a kid is clearly taking it's toll. Nia telling Jon he doesn't need to fight for everyone else constantly and it's okay to choose himself at times. This will come back in a conversation with Jay.

I am holding out having any feelings on this cause a large part of me refuses to believe DC would actually kill her, but if she is actually dead I'm gonna come back later and stare at this page in the saddest way possible.

He's so petty it kills me lmao

While it stresses me out to see them fight I love seeing them work through it, and it really shows the differences between them especially as this whole event has probably had a major impact on Jay in a negative way.

Jon realizing that he was trying to save the idea or memory of Nia over his Boyfriend after everything that's happened and deciding to prioritize what he wants, which is Jay. (more thoughts on this page at the end lol)

I think the Amazonians asking Jon for help was kind of a reminder to Jay of who Jon is at his core. Similarly to how Jon understood he probably can't dissuade Jay from hating Nia, I think Jay was reminded that Jon is just a forgiving and loving person, it is what drew Jay to Jon in the first place and that he shouldn't expect him to have the same reaction he has to Nia's death. I think Jay was going to say yes no matter what after this realization but I feel he normally would have thought about it more but decided to take that risk and give Jon a yes so he wouldn't be worried about it while in battle, you can see Jon flies away with a much more ready attitude.

Jon's "new place" is in his dreams, I had a worry Jon was just offering to live together with Jay because he thought it's what Jay would want but the fact that this is here means he has been dreaming of living in San Francisco for a while now, and the fact that Jay not being there destroying the dream really hits it home that being with Jay is what he wants. This is not Jon trying to make sure everyone in his life is happy at the cost of his own, this is Jon listening to what Nia told him to do and is choosing himself by following his dreams.

Final thoughts

Overall I really loved this issue and it really hit my expectations. It was very tough to follow at times but that's typical of dream sequences and this issue did it well, can't wait to see how Absolute Power ends and if Amanda will FINALLY face the consequences for her actions. I'll be holding out my comments on Nia until we know for certain she's dead, Nicole loves tormenting her characters so I wouldn't be surprised but I think she would also love to continue the beef between her and Jay. I'm extremely interested and hope Nicole or Sina do something in the future for Jay and Jon because right now they are probably the people at DC who I trust the most with the boys!!!

[nottakingresponsibility]

Welcome to the horrors, time to turn right.

"Hello there, I'll be posting out of my own free will, do whatever, don't expect me to be nice to you." [ooc introduction below the cut, triggers, tags, etc. Be warned. It is a lot.]

OOC here!! Waves. This is pre-crash, by the way! He's already aware of the Jimmyverse. You guys did this. About the mod! I am 18! Mainly go by he/him anyways, so this is fine! I'm not too great at socializing, but anyone is welcome to interact with me or Jimmy, it's always welcome!! Ocs and other fandoms included, of course! I can't guarantee I'll know anything about said fandom, but Jimmy won't know shit either so it works out, right? I do not support Jimmy's actions. I'm gonna make that clear here and now, I just enjoy his writing, and want to explore him as a character. He'll also be mean a lot, that's just how he is I fear. Obviously lots of swearing. Uh. I do that a lot. Hi. Also, JimCurl is the only ship I tolerate with Jimmy in it, and it will show up on this blog. I have a tag for it, don't worry! I know those men are awful for each other, and I would portray it as such. Even through Jimmy's twisted, unreliable perspective. I don't really have much of a DNI, other than the basic criteria. If you have to ask what that is, you probably shouldn't interact with me anyway. I highly encourage other blogs to interact with me!! It's really fun roleplaying and getting to know people. :] Roleplay wise, pretty much anything is on the table as long as everyone involved is having fun. Just to make this clear as well cause someone asked before, minors are allowed on this blog, yes, but they need to stay away from anything suggestive, and if it's found out a minor has asked anything weird, they will be blocked for their safety. Triggers and warnings you can expect on this blog. Obviously, the basic Mouthwashing triggers first off, but there's more! Jimmy has backstory and lore, wow. Well, in my version of him anyway. By that I mean, you can expect other things such as: Child abuse, child neglect, abuse in general, just Jimmy being Jimmy, self harm, sui ideation, sui in general, self harm thoughts, derealization, obviously just violence all around, manipulation and such, bugs, s/a themes, emetophobia stuff, eating disorder implications, alcoholic themes, death, murder, body horror, blood, cannibalism, I'm not sure if it's needed yet, but sometimes things do get suggestive, so be warned about that, too. There's a lot of things that happen here that I don't have an exact warning for, things happen in roleplay you can't predict. Just be wary and cautious, I'll try to put a warning before I write anything like that. Most of this is just based on things that may happen to Jimmy in the future. I'll update this if I missed anything!! Stay safe :] My tags and what they all mean! General tags!

#responsibilityhateshim: Jimmy answering his asks! #responsibilitytolerateshim: Jimmy answering his asks, to a person that has shown up often, so a regular! #responsiplay: Roleplay threads, or at this point it's just in character reblogs. #responsible[crew member name]: Roleplay thread or in character reblog with a specific member of the Tulpar crew! Or, you know, Polle. #jimmysrunningagain: My ooc tag! When this tag is used, it means I'm talking, not Jimmy! I also use () around my words! #jimbobsresponsibility: The JimCurl tag, things with this have either heavy implications of, or direct JimCurl in them. #responsiblelore: Lore tag! Things important to Jimmy as a character, things that may help you torture him further. #responsibilitytalks: Just a general Jimmy talking about things or doing things tag, when it's not in reply to an ask and it's not a reblog. Often open to roleplays with them if you want, though! #writingresponsibly: Jimmy posts where he's writing in his journal instead of actually speaking! These posts will also have all the journal written text in purple! #responsibilityisforgotten: New tag! It's for suggestive and ...possibly worse! Things, if it ever is needed. So minors, and people uncomfortable with that, please block this tag.

#musicalshenanigans: When people send music links to Jimmy or me! So be free to scroll around if you're looking for music.

#whimsyartjourney: When other people send in art! I just think it's neat. I don't draw, this isn't for me! That was a lot, right? There's more. Specific event tags! Aka, shit happens to Jimmy that can be classified as a special event, here's a tag for it. (psst. You can cause events too, if you play your cards right!) #lostlizardtales: That one time Jimmy lost his pet lizard, Ray! #truthpotionhorrors: When Jimmy accidentally drank a 'soda' that turned out to be some sort of truth potion, so he couldn't lie! #jimmyschildishresponsibility: When Jimmy got turned into his child self for a while. A little note, Jimmy doesn't remember any of these besides lostlizardtales! He only remembers his child journey vaguely as a dream and or hallucination. Person specific tags! Tags for specific characters, (like ocs, mainly) I just think it's fun! #washout: Kaleb Doran/Smokey tag! Aka that one Fallout oc that's Jimmy's frenemy! ...And also has a lot of other insane things going on! (atombombskilledtheradiostar) #lawsuitscalling: Brianne Cohen tag! Aka head of the legal team, being dragged into her job while just barely tolerating anyone she contacts! (exhausted-lawyer) That's all! Stay safe and have fun interacting! :] Jimmy death counter is at 9 by the way. None of them canon.

[stonemags]

stonemags

SUGAR BABY AU

Ch.7 Fend off

Characters in this series: Reader, Wanda Maximoff, Natasha Romanoff, Carol Danvers, Darcy Lewis, Maria Hill, Kate Bishop, Pepper Potts, Valkyrie, Shuri

Summary: You are trying to be a good friend, helping people that are closest to you to let go of their past. They take priority and even if you get hurt during the process, you need to keep them protected. Who will protect you? Will you let them?

Warnings: age gap relationships, sugar mommy/sugar baby relationships, swearing, fighting, blood, being hurt, arguments, mensplaning, all story is gonna be +18, you are responsible for your own ass. 

Word count: 6913

A/N: This chapter is the last one before a longer break, im not sure when i will post next one, but it will come. Thank you to all for the support it wouldn't be the same without you. I hope you will enjoy this chapter.

Previous chapter

You just woke up, but you can already feel the tension in your shoulders. It was a hard week for you, work, school even Wanda and Nat made days difficult for you. Everybody expects something from you, deadlines are not being kind, and everything is piling up in the exhausting hill of responsibilities. You feel yourself sinking recently and if it wasn't for your whole future at the line, you would probably stay in bed for the next two weeks. Recently even thoughts about your future were too heavy, usually working as a motivator, now they are making you feel like you're at a gunpoint. 

You didn't have to wake up with the sun today, after working till three am at the bar you needed that rest and thankfully everybody made sure not to bother you. You get up from the bed and immediately make it, so you can start your day not feeling guilty about having a mess around you or not being productive. It doesn't happen often but you actually plan on resting today. You put some music on and after meditating and giving offerings you hear a light knock at your door. 

“Hey.” Darcy stands in a doorway, two coffees in her hands. She always looks out for you, even in those small ways, and to be honest you do feel special. She would never do coffee for Maria or Kate. 

“Hey, you okay?” 

“Yeah, everythings okay.” She sits down on your bed, and sets the coffee on the side table. You decide that freaking out about the stains right now is not a good idea. You will deal with it later. To your surprise Darcy is ahead of you and she gets up and grabs coasters and your meds, she hands them to you with your coffee. 

“Thanks.” She nods and sits down at the previous spot. 

“Do you want to talk about your date?” You don't, you know she cares and that's where it's coming from, there is still anger lingering at the back of your head, that she set you up like this. 

“I- '' She looks puzzled, like she can't place exactly how to put into words feelings she has, but you understand. 

“I know.” 

“I was worried that you wouldn't agree to go. I should’ve handled it better, done it differently. To be completely honest, after we dropped you off I had been scolded by Carol already.” She laughs and you can't help but join her. You take a sip of your coffee, happily making yourself believe that it will wake your brain up more, and let her continue. 

“It wasn't nice. I'm sorry, I don’t want to act that way towards you.” 

“Thank you, I appreciate you being honest. I was mad, yes, even now I still am a little bit, but it’s going to pass. I'm just happy to be done with this.” 

“They called Carol after that night, and they didn't sound happy. She didn't tell me anything, at least not that much, but… Yn, what happened?” you don't want to get into it, but Darcy is your friend, she is on your side, and you want her to feel included. 

“Shuri called me in the middle of our dinner. I had to pick up Junior, it was an emergency. There was no taxi, no uber, nothing and this restaurant was so far away.” 

“Yeah, again sorry about it.” Darcy scratches the back of her head, trying to ease down the nerves. 

“They gave me a ride, and then we went to the theme park with Junior.” 

“It doesn't sound so bad.” She is confused, but at the same time she knows that nothing with you is just simply… simple. 

“It wouldn't be if I had any say in that. Darcy I had so much work I did not sleep the night after that. I agreed on extra work, i didnt had any food other that a fucking corn dog with junior that day, and nobody asked me about my opinion.” You start pacing around the room, you always talk with your arms and the more agitated you are the more they are working. 

“Did you tell them that?” 

“Yes I did. After the little family trip of course, I'm not a monster. I couldn't do that to Junior.” She nods in understanding. You both spend 20 more minutes chatting about everything that happens, while you clean your room. You will always happily use a body double to make yourself more productive, and it's so much easier with someone actually next to you. After a nice morning together and more cleaning around the apartment, Darcy told you that Kate asked you to call her and that it was rather important so you called right away. 

“Hey sweetie, you wanted me to call?... Yes ... mhm … no problem i got this, don't even worry about it, I’ll text you after everything … I’m always careful … Yes, I love you too.” You finished your phone call, and as you were sitting in the kitchen Maria could hear everything. She just finished cleaning the dishes after herself, knowing how much you hate, when one of them leaves something in the sink, after you cleaned the whole kitchen. They are really helpful with your hyperfixations. 

“What the bitch wanted?” You roll your eyes at the name that she used for Kate. 

“Be nice. She asked me if I could pick her things up from Val, she left some clothes in her godless danger zone cave.” You answer by not taking your eyes off your phone, already looking for the bus and metro schedule.

“Oh, that should be fun.” Maria goes around the kitchen island and leans her back on it, right next to where you sit. You found that about her pretty early, how flirty and cocky she is, once she feels comfortable with someone. It takes a while, but once she gets to know you, you would never say that she was shy at first. She is touchy, her love language always makes her try to be close to all of you. Some people find it confusing, but you learn at some point. Her smugness it's a part of your daily life and you enjoy the entertainment. 

“Yeah.. you are not going.” You get off the stool and start walking into your room to grab your bag. Your backpack is something you can’t leave the house without, you have a lot of useful things in it, which some of your friends find weird. There was always this sense of journey in you, or maybe running away actually, but this feeling made you always prepare to leave. Your backpack is always ready to help you survive if there is a need for you to.. well you aren’t sure what, but whatever that feeling means, you want to be ready. You have first aid there, a knife, dry pack meals which are not the worst and saved you a couple of times, along with unused metro and bus tickets, just in case and some rope. Sounds like a serial killer pack but all of the things were useful more times than you thought they would. 

You put your shoes on, take your hat and dark jacket off the hook, and as you leave the apartment Maria comes running out of her room. 

“Maria you’re not going.”

“Shut up, we have a bus in 10 minutes, come on.” She put her vintage 90s style jacket on and went out leaving you to close the door. She also learned a lot about you, and how discussing anything with you and trying to convince you of something is usually a waste of time. You respect that and her, the way she talks to you makes you feel safe with her, you know what to expect, there are no games, no double meaning under any words, no malice or anger behind anything. She lays things on the table and you feel safe with honesty. You don't fight her, you close the heavy door, almost tripping over the shoes again on your way out and follow Maria to the bus stop. 

Drive took both of you not more then 20 minutes, Valkyrie lives in one of her friends houses from what you know. There have been a couple of times when you were picking Kate up from there but you never went in, for Val it was an issue itself that you are even in the neighborhood. From what you noticed from the outside there is a flag in the window, which is a red flag itself, cigarette buds pretending to be flowers in the garden and broken mailbox in front. Overall a very welcoming environment. You come up to her door and knock hard on the surface, trying to make sure she will hear you over the loud techno music. You feel nauseous, and you know that will not be an easy pick up, but you would do everything for Kate, even put yourself in dangerous situations so she doesn't have to. You hear screaming coming from the inside, someone yelling over music to open the door. Maria is right behind you, she grabs the right part of your open jacket, which is exactly why you didn't want to bring her with you. In situations like that it's hard enough for you to make sure you are going to be okay, and as sad as it is, anyone coming with you as a support is just an additional responsibility to you. Doors open with unnecessary force. In front of you there is Valkyrie, drunk out of her mind, in the middle of the week, before noon. To be honest if someone would ask you to describe her that's exactly what you would say. 

“The fuck you want?” Off to a great start. 

“Don't make it harder for yourself, give me Kate’s things back and we will be out of here.” She scoffs at you and spits on the ground. That's a comedy behavior and if you wouldn't fear things escalating because of Maria, you would already have a good laugh. Val comes out of the doorway and invades your personal space, trying to dominate you as she is always tired when you meet with her. It was an interesting battle and you were enjoying playing this game with her, till one day when you overheard how much unnecessary shit Kate had to hear from Val after that. She was always jealous of how close you were to Kate, and since that day you tried to be … less with Kate, when her girlfriend was around. You can smell the horrible alcoholic odor coming from Val, since Kate broke up with her it seems like she fell even lower, you didn't think it was possible. You stand your ground not letting any fear get to you, but Maria takes two steps back, not really enjoying the fact that she had to let go of you. 

“Tell this slut-'' keep your cool yn, don't kill her, you promised Kate to be as civil as you can “-that if she wants anything back, she needs to come for it herself. I will make sure that she will have a really nice time with me, time she will remember for a long time.Whore likes it rough, but you should know something about it right Yn?” Valkyrie pushes you to the ground taking you off guard and  she closes the door behind her, laughing. You get up and straighten your clothes, you can feel your facade breaking, almost as you can hear the sounds of cracks in your patience.You can feel your heart beating in every single vain, your teeth are clenched together, tha same as your fists. You never felt so angry in your life, at least you don't think you did. You never felt so angry at someone and yourself, that you let this relationship go for so long, you recall all those moments when you thought that Kate was silently screaming for help, and you weren't listening. At least this, now, in this moment, you can and will make it right. Maria comes up to you and touches your shoulder bringing you back out of your head. 

“Yn-” she grabs your clenched hand “-your knuckles are white.” That's just a second of making a decision, at this moment you knew what it's going to take to make this end, to set Kate free, and you were ready for it the moment you left your apartment. 

“They’re about to get red.” The force of opening and shutting doors behind you makes Maria jump. She stands outside wondering if she should follow after you, she hears the music abruptly stop and then shouting. She takes two steps towards the door and as she is about to put her hand on the cold handle she hears the sounds of fighting, something breaks, sounds of glass shattering hurt her ears. Her eyes get teary and she doesn't know what to do. She won't be able to physically help you, and she knows for sure Val wasn't alone in the house. She stands in the yard and takes out her phone, trying to pick up Pepper's number with shaking hands. She immediately picks her eyes up at the door at the squeaky sound of opening. You come out and really slowly close the door behind you, one hand on the handle and second one holding a bag. Contrast between you entering and exiting the house is making Maria question if the first one even happened. The first thing your friend notices is that your knuckles are actually red, but so is your face and your shirt. She comes to you really fast trying to take a better look at your face.

“Jesus Christ Yn! Are you okay?” She lifts her hand and you grab her wrist stopping her. You lift your head up, letting her take a good look at you. 

“Let’s go, we are walking home.” She doesn't question you, she just grabs the bag from your hand. Maria doesn't comment on your busted upper lip, or greenish bruise appearing under your left eye, or the cut on your right eyebrow that drowns your vision with blood, or even the way you hold your ribcage. She listens to you, but at the same time being so worried about the state you are in she texts Pepper what happened, hoping that she will know what to do and how to help you. You are irritated with your clothes getting dirty and splitting one of your knuckles open. You don't feel pain, you feel satisfaction that you finally got something done, that you finally stood up for someone you love, adrenaline still kicking in keeping you painless, it's a good feeling, probably too good, but that's something you will worry about later. 

On your way home Maria got information from Pepper to just bring you back and everything will be taken care of. You two are one street away from your apartment complex and both of you recognise Peppers car standing on the street. Not really feeling like talking, you tell Maria that you will just head upstairs and take a bath, maybe try to get rid of this already dried out blood from your face. 

“Yn, you look like hell.” You are highly aware of that and Pepper’s comment is really unnecessary. 

“Kate finished her job earlier today. I picked her up. I was planning on picking up Maria too and taking those beautiful girls somewhere out to eat.” 

“Cool, have a nice time.” You can’t tell if that was addressed to you or Maria, or if Pepper was asking your permission, but your face hurts and you just want to go upstairs.

“I'm sorry I can’t leave Yn alone.” 

“Yes you can. Go have fun.” You send Maria a smile forgetting how painful it is for you right now to use any face muscles. 

“But-” 

“Precious, Yn is right, also I don't think that she wants Kate to see her this way, am I right?” 

“Very, I’ll be okay, have fun.” You give your friend a short hug and leave with Kate's bag. Pepper’s comment is right, you wouldn’t want any of your friends to see you this way, that's why you didn't want Maria to go with you in the first place, but you can't help feeling slightly hurt by that. Maybe it’s better for you to be left alone right now, coming up the stairs you worry about Darcy's reaction, she will for sure yell at you for being reckless. 

You enter the apartment and set Kate’s bag in the washroom to immediately wash everything that it contains. You walk around the apartment only to find out that you are alone. 

“Well, for the better i guess.” Talking to yourself is a normal thing, saying out loud a plan for the day, concerns or just letting your thoughts flow outside, airing out your head is something you enjoy with your loneliness. You are happy to be alone, nobody will see you being hurt, nobody will worry, take care of you or freak out at Val. You don't need that, just you and your solitude is enough. 

You go to the bathroom and start undressing, a big mirror on the side wall allows you to see all of your injuries. Bruise is purple by now, and your face is covered in red, you are not surprised that Pepper had this disgusted look on her face. You slowly take your shirt off along with your bra, and just then you can see how dark is your right rib cage. Valkyrie took advantage of this one movement when you stumbled on something and fell in her house. She managed to deliver one kick onto your chest,at least you turned to the side in time and swept her off her feet. You would be happy to say that she looks worse than you, but you can’t, you promised Kate, so you protected yourself just as necessary. It doesn't matter how much you want to see her in pain, suffering for everything she has done. Val didn't have an easy life, but that doesnt give her a right to ruin others. 

You decided on taking a warm shower and then getting some numbing ointment along with some food into your system. You are not sure if you had breakfast today, and your stomach is starting to hurt. You leave the foggy bathroom, covered in your towel and go straight into the kitchen. You start looking through the cabinets for a first aid box you have in the apartment, unaware of someone sitting in the living room. 

“Need help Yn?” You jump at the sound of Natashas voice and a box with medicine falls to the ground spilling everything out. You hang your head low, without even turning around to make sure your towel stays secured around your chest and take two deep breaths. You hear Nat and Wanda get up and move closer to you. You turn around and to their surprise you are in much worse condition than they imagined when Pepper called them. Your face swells a little bit around your one eye, blood luckily only slowly going out of your lips and brow, but you have to still make sure to wipe it once in a while. Wanda covers her mouth with a shocked expression on her face, while Natasha looks just.. angry, but you can't tell if thats because of how you look or if that's just her face, to be fair she is always kind of angry. You don't have energy to play their game, to discuss, talk, talking hurts, you want them gone. 

“Pepper called us.” Ah that explains it.

“Great, she is not here. I'll Let you know when she will come back.” You don't even try to pick up the box, you leave the kitchen and go to your room, aware of your half naked situation. You need to put some sweats on, and take care of yourself. It takes you just a couple of minutes and you are hoping that they are gone by now. You are going back into the kitchen and to your surprise they are sitting by the island, drinking tea and right next to them there is a third mug, yours green one. 

“Yn, how are you feeling?” Wanda is concerned but you don't own her nothing, so you stay silent. 

“Look-” she gets up from her seat to approach you by the fridge, you need to eat something. 

“-I know you are not really fond of us-” You scoff at that under your nose, and you regret it immediately, when sharp pain goes straight into your head. Adrenaline is gone and you can feel everything now. You grab the side of your head trying to keep it at bay. “-but we want to help… let us help.” You think about it, you are tired but in too much pain to go to sleep. They picked the medicine up but you still have to look through it to find the right kind and ointment. Even thinking hurts now. 

“Yn, can you please sit down?” Natasha’s voice is soft, you never hear her speak in this way, maybe once, just once when at Carol's party you caught one moment when Natasha and Wanda were alone. The way they were with each other, spoke to each other, praised each other, this is the voice Natasha used. You are not really sure what's the reason, maybe you are too tired for that right now, but you listen. You drag yourself into the living room and sit down slowly on the couch. Natasha is immediately next to you with a cup of tea and Wanda on the other side holding painkillers, a sandwich and numbing ointment, almost like they read your mind. 

“Darcy told us what you might need, she called and also asked us to apologize that she is not here. Carol took her on a business trip and she will be back in two days.” You nod at the information, warming up because of the tea or maybe the fact that wherever Darcy is she has your back. 

You take your painkillers, eat a surprisingly good sandwich and the last thing you need to do is use the ointment. 

“Thank you for your help.” You make a move to take it from Wanda's hand but she moves it out of your reach. 

“Let me.” 

“No.”

“Why?” 

“Just no. Leave it okay?” You try to grab it again and in that moment Natasha puts her hand on the side of your body, just to try and get your attention, talk you out of being so stubborn, but she doesn't know about your ribcage. The moment her palm lands on your shirt, the sharp pain follows through your whole body, you scream a little not being able to contain your reaction in time. They both look scared while you bend down in half, trying to breathe normally and stop crying. You can’t hold it in, you try by biting your lip, which reminds you that it's still bleeding and the bite really didn't help. You get up, out of their reach, you stand in front of them, looking and feeling like a mess.

“Please just… leave. I'm going to be okay, I’ll handle it, just give me that and leave.” You clench your jaw like your life depends on it. Your tears are mixing with the blood coming out of your lip. Wanda makes sure to stand up slowly, treating you like you are about to break down, crumble into pieces and nothing makes you more pissed than this pity look in her eyes. She wants to say something, not really sure what, but her wife is faster. 

“Lift up your shirt.” 

“Pervert.” 

“Yn.. this-” she points at you and moves her hand around “- all of this,as much as it's cute and admirable, it's pissing me off. You really think this is just about you?” You want to argue back, make your statement, not back down, you are just not sure if you have enough energy for that. 

“No Yn, it's not. What do you think Kate will feel, after seeing her friend suffer because of her. And yes I know she didn't do it, but you fought for her, you really think she wont feel responsible for that?” You stay silent, feeling like a kid being scolded, you feel your chin getting wet with blood and tears. Your ribcage still hurts and makes it hard for you to breathe. You are ready for Natasha to start screaming at you, but she just let her wife take over.

“I'm going to lift your shirt up okay?” You don't fight them, you let her. She slowly lifts up your right side of the shirt revealing dark purple and pink bruises, covering at least three or four of your ribs. 

“Oh..yn.” You look at Wanda and you see one tear falling down her cheek. You cover yourself up fast and take two steps back to put some distance between you two. 

“Satisfied?” Natasha looks sad, and disappointed. You can't read them and that's the most frustrating thing for you. 

“We have a personal doctor, she works for us and has a monthly payment, doesn't matter if she works or not. I called her and she will be here in thirty minutes. Will you please let her take a look at your ribs and face? I promise it won’t cost us anything”  She is actually waiting for your answer, you look between them. Wanda with the ointment in her hands holding it so tightly, Natasha with a phone in her hand and this terribly worried look on her face. Another sharp pain goes straight into your head, you bend down to try and not react too much to it, but they can see. 

“Yes…I…yes, please.” Natasha nods at you and you leave the room, uncomfortable with the situation, you decide to wait for the doctor in your bedroom. 

It takes 40 minutes for the doctor to get to the apartment. At this point you took two more painkillers you had in your room, and you tried to just lie down in a way that hurts the least. You didn't check on Nat or Wanda, they can take care of themselves and as much as you would like to care even a little, the state you are in is hard to do so. Kate and Maria called you to check up on you. Of course Maria told everybody everything. You managed to pull some strength out of yourself to sound well, like you are doing okay ish at least. Seems like they bought it, you don't need them to worry more then they do already. Wanda came to your room to ask if the doctor could come in, you thought she would try to stay with the both of you but fortunately she left and gave you some space. Doctor said that it would be good to do xr-ay of your ribs but they don't seem broken, just really bruised. She stitched your eyebrow and said that your lip will heal on itself, you are relieved that you don't have to go to the hospital, that would probably ruin you financially. 

After the meeting with the doctor you walk her out of the apartment making sure she wouldn't start talking about your state with Wanda and Natasha. Apologizing for the mess at the entrance you thank her and close the door behind her, wishing her a nice rest of her day. You are facing two issues now. First you need to get rid of both women from your apartment and get ready for your shift at the bar. You are not really sure how you will manage, but you have to somehow. You feel presence behind you and you are not ready for questioning, you are not ready for anything right now. 

“What did she say?” Natasha is holding Wanda's hand tightly, trying to calm her down a bit. 

“I'm healthy as a horse.” She just rolls your eyes and that somehow makes you feel bad. 

“I'm sorry, first I really appreciate your help with all that, it means a lot. She said that I should be okay with my ribs, she stitched my eyebrow and lips should heal on their own.” Wanda reaches out with her hand. Very lightly she touches the area around your eyebrow, soft palm is feeling cold on your heated face. You don't know why but you let her get a closer look at your face, Natasha grabs your chin and picks it up slowly to take a better look at your lip. As she lets go her thumb touches the corner of your lips, and you feel her touch linger there even after her hands return to her side. It's hard to explain what's happening with you, pain mixing with the feeling of comfort, hurt mixing with soft touches, that's too much for today, or for the whole month, it's hard to tell, but you start crying out of nowhere. Silent tears escaping through closed eyelids, too afraid of what your eyes might be saying right now. You feel Wanda's hand touch the side of your head, lightly playing with your hair. Normally you would find it awkward. Silently standing at the entrance of the house, nobody is speaking, your eyes are closed and your fist clenched. You feel yourself lean your head in the direction of Wanda’s hand. The sound of your phone ringing brakes whatever was just happening between all of you and you open your eyes, looking scared and embarrassed. 

“I need to pick it up. I'm sorry.” They follow after you into the living room. You look at your phone and the caller id makes your body shiver. 

“What?” You start pacing around, you feel the eyes of both women follow your moves and you are making sure to stay extra careful with how you speak.

“No…Yes, at the end of the week.” You look at them sitting at the kitchen island, not even pretending that they are not listening. 

“That's too much… I need to pay for school this month…No…Well, fuck you back… Listen, you take this or nothing at all, goodbye.” You hang up your phone and grab the side of your head, feeling the pain creeping up your lower back, coming from the tips of your fingers that hold the phone, through your spine into the top of your head. It's sharp but a little less after numbing yourself with pills. Your phone rings again and you are not having it today. 

“WHAT?!” You regret not looking at your phone this time. “Shit, Steve, I'm sorry. Yeah my shift starts at six.” That makes Natasha stand up

 from her chair. She is looking at you as you just said the dumbest thing she ever heard. “Yeah I understand but you know, Darcy can be dramatic. It’s not that bad… No! Listen, I need the money, okay? Don't ask Bucky, I'll be there.” He starts arguing, telling you how dangerous it can be for you, telling you that you might have concussion, or just some head trauma, that he can lend you the money for the day, he is really trying to keep you off of work. As you are about to talk back to him, Natasha takes your phone from your hand and tells Steve that you will call him back in a second. The audacity. 

“You are an adult Yn, right? Then let's talk like adults.” That will be an interesting conversation. You are taking it into the living room, following Natasha with Wanda closing behind you. You sit down on  the couch and they give you your mug filled with warmed up tea. It's even your favorite of the month, chamomile.Something about the smell and taste of it makes you feel calmer. You wait for one of them to start, not really knowing what they are even doing here at this point, you feel ashamed about how much you let them get close to you, maybe a little bit sick even, or maybe it's just because of your head. 

“You should sue her, the girl that did this to you.” It's not a question and surprisingly it's coming from Wanda. 

“No.” You know it might not make any sense to them but you have your reasons. 

“I don't understand you Yn. Why? She hurt you, she did something horrible to your friend, why are you even trying to protect her.”

“I'm not protecting her.”

“You are, and you are putting Kate in danger because of it.” That makes you shut up and listen. For once you let them continue, really taking in what they are saying. The feeling of your throat closing up makes you feel like a kid again and you don't like it. 

“You really think that she will be noble and won’t try to get you back, or Kate. If she would want to hurt you she has at least 3 ways of doing that.” You just look at her not really understanding what she means by that. 

“Kate, Maria and Darcy. They are your soft spot Yn, you would always protect them or die trying. But sometimes you are fighting with somebody bigger than you, something bigger. How will you protect them if you are at work all the time, how will you protect Kate when she finishes her work at midnight and you are not with her. And even if you would pick her up everyday, you can't be at 3 places at the same time. You need help and we can provide it.”

“The question is will you let us?” They are looking at you in a way it's hard to describe.You feel the care they try to give but you can help but follow your thoughts and your gut feeling about the “why” of their intentions. What's in it for them? The thought of your friends getting hurt is crashing for you. It feels like the ceiling is slamming onto your chest making you unable to breathe. You hate feeling hopeless but you are not stupid, you can admit when your power or control over the situation goes thin with how serious things got. You need them and that is the worst thing that can happen to you. Needing somebody gives them control over you, your life, your decisions and it's just a matter of time when they will use it against you. You don't know when, but there will be this one moment, when one of them will cross your boundaries because you own them. They helped you, they were good and nice so it means that there is invisible space to hurt you, to make it even. You just need to trust yourself that you will be able to handle it when it comes, because it will, it always does. People prove you right, but you don't have a choice. 

“I just want her out and far, can you do that? Can you help?” It comes out through your clenched teeth. 

“We can” Natasha seems proud of herself, the sickening smirk on her face makes you believe that she is happy about this whole situation. 

“How much will it cost me?” Everything has a price and you want to know it before you will agree on anything. Wanda tries to comfort you but you won’t fall for that. 

“Yn you don't have to pay us anything.”

“I can't not pay, tell me how much.”

“Dinner, you said that it feels like work on our date. You own us dinner. “ Natasha states and you take a second weighing your options. 

“Okay, deal. I'm gonna buy you dinner.” The idea is not your favorite but you are grateful for the opportunity to pay them back somehow, maybe it will lower down the feeling of guilt you have about them helping you. 

“No,no. You're gonna cook us dinner, at our house, we have an amazing kitchen, wanda will gladly help you, she has amazing taste. right honey?” If Nat is trying to contain her excitement about having the upper hand she is not doing a very good job. 

“Oh yes, we do.” Wanda answers by not taking her eyes off of you, especially your lips. You don’t know if she is trying to flirt with you or is looking at your cut, that's still bleeding a little, you feel the iron taste every time you run your tongue on it. 

“Okay.” This is too important and you know it. Sometimes we have to admit when we lose, today you feel that way. 

Next twenty minutes you spend on walking through the whole process of getting a restraining order against Valkyrie. It takes a lot of talking and paperwork but Wanda is amazing at her job so winning the case should be a matter of a couple weeks. You maily want it for Kate and your friends, you would rather not be on any record but Wanda is really stubborn about it, so you agree. After explaining and taking all the notes they have to take pictures of your injuries.You don;t want them to see you half naked but you understand the necessity of it. You ask Wanda to be the one taking the pictures, there is something about Natasha tak that makes you feel a little unsafe, you can't put your finger on it but it's there, and as hurt as she looks she doesn't argue. Evening came fast, it's getting dark pretty early at this time of year, so you made tea for all of you, as a small thank you towards two older women, that showed you a lot of kindness. You are all sitting in comfortable silence, they made you call off work which you understand, also Steve texted you he will kill you if you would come. You can feel their stare on you but you don't address it, keeping your eyes down on your green mug. The next thing that Wanda says takes you a bit off guard. 

“I know you are scared, Yn... but you are doing just fine.”

“It doesn't feel that way.” You didn't catch yourself in time, you don't know where it's coming from but you feel yourself opening up. 

“You are doing just fine.” Natasha joins in, your shoulders visibly stiff, mug in your hands lightly burn your palms with warmness but you can't let it go. You feel yourself slipping in some way, into the deeper part that is usually kept at bay, out of everybody, out of the outside world, inside of you, reminding you that it exists as clenched fists or stomach ache. You make yourself into a vessel that can only hold that much, each night in some controlling way you let go of some pain, stress or any hard emotions that are filling you up. Today you didn't get much time by yourself and it seems like you're overflowing, and you hate yourself for the stains you make with your sadness. 

“It doesn't feel fine... why doesn't it feel fine?” It's funny how you think anyone can have an answer to that, even more, people that know nothing about you. You hate how pathetic you sound. 

“It seems like everybody is making you reach unreachable standards, they expected too much so now you don't allow yourself any rest because you feel like you need to reach higher. But you are doing just fine, sugar. What you did today was heroic, maybe a little dumb, but you did it out of love and that was admirable” To your surprise what Natasha says actually makes some sense, and you feel it in your work, in your devotion to your friends, or in the ways you try to handle your struggles. 

“It's true.. I think it's true.” You take your eyes from your mug and stare directly at Natasha, to make sure that the things you say flow through every single part of her, to see in her eyes that she actually understands. You swallow the pain, with the lump in your throat and as you reach for the raw part of you, knowing that you will regret it tomorrow you show both of them more true than before part of yourself . 

“It is true Tasha.. and it changes nothing.” Your tone was the one ending this conversation. You see by Wanda's face that she wants to argue, tell you that you are just wrong, so, so wrong about this, but her wife grabs her hand and squeezes it two times with a light smile on her face. You stand up and put your mug into the sink. You move towards your room and they dont stop you. You hear them gather their stuff as you reach your door. You defeated them, proved one more time that nobody can save you from yourself. Good fucking job, be proud. You think to yourself while hearing the entrance door closing leaving you alone in an empty house. To be honest if you weren't stuck in your body you would do the same.

Next chapter

tag list : @autorasexy @lizziejolsen @natashaswife4125 @sayah13 @romanoffskisser @lijo-8 @jjiiuuisssagcebrcw @natashaswife4125 @dumbassbitchwithnotits @teenybean, @marvelwomen-simp, @ripofflizzie

[snow-lavender]

now that we're a week out from the finale, i'm feeling settled enough to make my sappy post. TL;DR is: fable has been incredibly important to me, and i think it's a story that's important to have out there. to the community and cast, you've made something beautiful and helped me more than you could know.

so here we go-

i started watching fable in the summer of 2022, to kill time in between summer courses (and thank fuck for that, cause my brain desperately needed to have some fun after 5 hours a day of doing psych stats by hand.) i was originally pulled in by vo'lete, as dissecting a conlang is really fun to me. it became basically the only media i consumed, as 2022/2023 was the fourth year of my BA and i was crazy busy. and then the characters pulled me in further with their earnestness and their devotion to redemption and compassion.

i think one of the theses of fable is "people always deserve happiness. doing awful things doesn't erase your ability to change." and i think the simplicity and love of that take hit really close to home. in the era of modern fandom where bad actors try to make everything black and white, it's an important point to make.

i started making shitposts on tumblr, started enaging with stories from an analysis standpoint again, and found a lot of joy in the community here. i don't have the words for what that means to me, so i'll just default to you guys are great <3

then mid-august happened

those of you who frequent rin's streams might have caught bits and pieces of this, but basically, i had a fall and my knee became royally fucked beyond belief. it can only be fixed with a surgery that's not very common. the pain was (and still is) debilitating to the point that i had to drop out of my second degree, and couldn't walk more than like, a block every few days. my life, my dreams, my future all got put on hold. i was in a new city with no supports, no friends, and no way to leave my apartment. fable went from the only media i consumed to the only thing i did, period.

the fandom became the only people i talked to regularly, other than my family, as online relationships were the only ones possible to maintain. in fableblr and in rin's chat i've found people who i really click with, people whose company i enjoy and who enjoy mine. when i was lying in bed, feeling so alone and less than human, having people on the internet go "i know who you are and you are making an impact," quite frankly, kept me sane. i know i don't talk to people super often, but know that seeing you in my notifs brings me so much joy, and i'd love to talk to you more.

to assuage any worries- i'm doing a bit better now. i've moved back in with my parents so i have human contact and people who can make up for the things i can't do. i have a new doctor who is taking the severity of my condition very seriously and is fighting to get me treated asap. i'll be okay.

so yeah. fable has been super important to me, and will remain so! for me it's a story with so much joy and deep feelings and rediscovery of passions and just. fun. it's been so much fun. and i'm not letting go of that fun any time soon. i'm gonna keep making and watching and enjoying.

to sage, corn, and cob- you guys are great, i cherish every time we get to talk. i hope that it's okay that i count you among my friends

to my other mutuals and people who are here frequently- recognizing you in my notes is such a joy and i hope to get to know you better. y'all are cool and i'm glad you think i'm funny

to rin- thank you for nurturing your little community and creating a space where i have so much fun. also thank you for putting up with my constant setting off of automod

to beck- thank you for making a story that explores sisterhood in all its ugliness and beauty, that shows how even families full of love can fuck up, that holds space for loneliness and loss and joy and fear and new beginnings

to the rest of the cast- thank you for making a story with so many varied and yet connected points, characters and world. with so much love in it. you've truly done something special here and its impact will not be forgotten

to all of you- thank you for knowing my name. thank you for breathing life and joy into these stories. i can't wait to see what else we make. <3

[allgoldenelite]

NOAH New Year show translations

Rather than reposting the screenshots from Twitter here, I'm gonna make my tls an original post here on Tumblr.

bummers ahead, please proceed with care

Ibushi: (tl link)

"I got scammed by a place called C5 Clinic* that I tweeted about before, which has branches in the whole country. Please be careful, everyone.

I think NOAH will release information about my surgery and bone fractures and dislocation and such. I'm sorry to everyone for the inexcusable match. Everything is my fault."

*this clinic specializes in adipose tissue stem cell treatment

Ibushi: (tl link)

"Sorry for the late message. I think there will be a detailed report from NOAH, but I'm letting you know that my left ankle is a mangled mess, and I'll have surgery for the right [ankle] ligament. I think there will be a release [by NOAH] soon.

I'm really, really sorry."

Ibushi: (tl link)

"I've come [this far] with the goal of getting 20 years [in ring career], so I think it might be time soon [to quit] being an active [wrestler]. I still have a lot of contracts and such left so I'll see those through!

I try not to think too much about the negative things or the future and stuff like that, but I have a lot of things [to do] like taking care of my mother, so when it's time I'll talk about it! Don't miss a single match😊 ‼️ "

Jake Lee: (tl link)

"It's not about whose fault it is or anything like that

Everyone awaits you standing in the ring again

That's what I believe."

more under the cut

Marufuji: (tl link)

"Good morning. [The] Ariake Arena [show] was a couple days ago.

I'm going to assume that you understand that as professionals, we have to share perfection with everyone.

I feel sorry to the fans who, spending good money and valuable time, came to watch what could not meet the expectations, if you listen to a lot of the opinions.

I write "a lot of opinions" because there are people who hold a different opinion than that.

I can't write in detail here about the two different sides, but...

I think among the staff there are probably people from either side.

So there are among the wrestlers.

"As professionals, we have to share perfection with everyone": In the end, I've certainly learned a lot from being unable to share that.

[When you're] going for sharing perfection, it's also important to take big risks.

I myself ascribe to both.

But when you gamble, sometimes you fail.

I think as people, we often want to walk the path that's safe for ourselves. I think there is an incredible amount of pressure on those who challenge themselves to taking big risks with shows that they have a responsibility for because many other people aside from themselves are involved.

I want to convey my thanks to those people. And at the same time, I want to urge [everyone] to work hard so that we, based on what happened, change the things we can change and head for a brighter future.

There have been a lot of developments on the part of the wrestlers as well, so I think it'll be exciting as long as everyone can keep their professionalism.

I wasn't able to watch New Japan's Tokyo Dome show yesterday, but the news were everywhere.

In the end it is frustrating.

And also I, you know [...]

I wasn't able to show what I'm made of at all.

I think personally, I have to try and search for something new. That goes for moves and for where I stand as well.

I feel like if I don't, then [my career] is just going to end like with me as a boring wrestler.

Because I'm a guy who does what he decides to do (I [shouldn't] say this myself]...

Look forward to it."

underneath that post was a reply by someone going:

"I agree with the risk taking thing. But what bothers me is, I think Ibushi is under contract with AEW for the time being, however through this failed gamble he got injured and I worry about how the other side [AEW] is going to react to that. Looking at it that way, I think I can't agree with a gamble that involves a wrestler from another promotion."

and then someone else replied to that:

"Ibushi came into this already injured so you don't have to write that Marufuji injured him or something, do your research before you post"

and to that Ibushi replied: (tl link)

"I was in the best condition I could've been in to walk 500 meters, not exactly [have a] match. But I gave in to [NOAH?] negotiating with me 3 or 4 times like 'can't you please make it work?' It's my fault."

NOAH: (tl link)

"An announcement about Ibushi Kôta's medical diagnosis

As a result of a thorough examination, Ibushi Kôta, who suffered injuries during the NOAH Ariake Arena show on January 2nd, has been diagnosed with a complex injury of the lateral ankle ligament of the right foot, along with a rupture of the tibiofibular ligament of his right leg.

Regarding the left foot, there will be a separate thorough examination and dedicated treatment.

As soon as we learn more we will let you know further.

We deeply apologize for any inconvenience and concerns we caused the fans and every single person involved, and ask for your understanding and cooperation."

[syoddeye]

ok re re: your answer to that question about soap's death, i'm curious what you think will happen in the next game and how the rest of the 141 will act post-soap death? 😅 late to the conversation but i replayed mw iii last weekend and after seeing that ask it's on my mind.

hi! late or not, cod's my current fixation, so i think about this fairly often. no worries.

it's difficult to say what will happen in the next campaign. one thing i know for certain is that infinity ward/activision will fumble something major and/or important. but, to be serious:

i think we will see makarov die (in the graves way so they can bring him back later on, probably with a dramatic eye scar).

i think we will see price or ghost die (either one would fit).

a price monologue that echoes earlier scenes in the campaigns (him confronting gen shepherd via zoom, his convo with gaz in old comrades, etc.).

gaz stepping into a leadership role, because he is clearly price's successor and to me, destined to go further.

the task force disbanding at the end (setting the stage for surviving characters to be brought back in the future).

i made a wish list for shits and gigs earlier this month lol. i have no idea how many reboot games using this timeline and cast are planned, or what's actually realistic.

as for how price, gaz, and ghost will react to soap's death? i mean...

price is gonna suffer the most, tbh, because soap died trying to save him and it happened right in front of him. i don't subscribe to the whole "price is the task force dad" thing, but obviously, as the leader, a mentor, and being personally responsible for recruiting the sergeant, losing soap's going to fuck him up a bit. my guy infiltrated the pentagon to kill a four star general. and that's how his revenge arc starts. in my gut, i think he's gonna do some even dirtier shit next game.

ghost's not gonna crack as many jokes. he'll be even more brutal. if he doesn't get the killing blow on makarov, price will.

and gaz? i think he'll be one trying to hold it together, maybe even trying to temper price's actions and decisions. like i said above, i imagine him taking more of a leadership role.

i've said it before and i'll say it again, if you asked me in early 2023 if i imagined myself joining the call of duty fandom, i would've laughed in your face. but here i am. a ha.

[gensokyogarden]

it's almost new years and you guys have been there for me so much during this year so tonight I do want to make a post trying to recognize a lot of people within the community. My head is pretty fuzzy right now so I fear I'm gonna forget some folks, in which case I'm honestly genuinely very sorry, but know that so many of you have touched my life in a positive way. Since I wasn't fully around on Thanksgiving either, consider this my chance of telling you all that I'm thankful for you too.

Some of you may not see this. Either because you don't follow this blog or you've been offline for a while. But I hope even if you don't see this post you still are able to understand my feelings towards you.

At the moment I would prefer if people don't reblog this. I'm not the most comfortable with my out of character thoughts being spread around. However if you know someone in this but think they won't see it on their own you are welcome to link them to this. Also if you're mentioned in this and you REALLY want to save it, I guess I can't stop you from reblogging.

Ruler: It feels like anytime I'm in a rough spot you always have kind words for me. With how often you're in character I just deeply respect you always breaking it for me. You've helped me to feel safe in the community during a very difficult time. That means the world to me.

Annette-mun: I know we only met a year ago but you have become an incredibly close friend to me. Being honest, I rank you as one of my best friends. I have fun with all of the boardgames we play together as well as the connections we've made between a lot of our muses. I always want to recognize all the work you put in sending me those ask spams. I'm sorry that because of head stuff I haven't been able to answer most of the new set. It makes me feel as if I've failed to respect the effort that you have put in. But I hope some day in the future I can fix that. I'm very glad we're friends.

Vel: You're a really funny friend and I care about you a lot. I feel that sometimes I'm not sensitive enough to things that may bother you and worry I may have upset you at times in the past. If I have, I'm really sorry. You write Kyouko really well and your ocs are also quite fun. Thanks for letting me make Nagi. Sometimes you say things that make me feel you are self-concious about your blog and other things. So I just wanna reiterate that I am in your corner and here for you whenever you need.

Slap: I was shy towards you at first, I'll admit. It may not seem it but I'm kinda a shy person in general and I'm nervous to warm up to people, but I'm glad you joined the Touhou community. You're a really funny guy. I love reading your posts on my dash and now I also love playing the occasional game with ya. Your ability to do voice and to commit to bits is astounding. I'm really glad I met you.

Argo: You're someone who is always there for me. I really appreciate that. I left the Fate community for personal reasons years ago now. I'm very glad that, despite that, I still ended up meeting you. Because you've been such a good friend to me. I'm glad that you've gotten somewhat into Touhou because it gives us more room to interact. You've really been there when I've needed you. Often you apologize and say you don't do enough but you've done so much for me. You're special to me.

Hoche: Through all the struggles I've gone through you have been very supportive of me. You have been a level headed voice of support and advice. I think that if it were not for you I would have been worse off in many different circumstances. Aside from that you are a very talented writer. I find myself stunned by some of what I've seen you write. Thank you for everything you've done for me and for being my friend.

Zane: You always show me cool warhammer things and that's special to me. I also really like Nyalter. I love ocs in general, but I think you have done a phenomenal job in giving her a life and story that is uniquely hers. I find it to be quite inspirational and it really pushes me to work harder on my own original characters.

Amber: I have mentioned this before but you were the first person to welcome me into the community. That is always going to be special to me. During that period when you left I teared up a fair amount because it felt like things would always be so different with you gone. I'm very glad that you came back. I really like all your ocs. I'm glad Eri isn't gone but I'm also really happy to be seeing the opportunity for your other ocs to shine as well. They're all fun, but I'm particularly a fan of Anna.

Kay: You've given me some of the advice that has helped me the most when I have been in a bad spot. I can't thank you enough for that. You've stopped me from making really bad decisions. You've also just been a fun and supportive friend. I am very interested in your Reimu and the story arc you've created with the hakurei god.

Swigg: I know we haven't talked much lately. I think our schedules don't line up the best. But you recently mentioned trying to get back into Tumblr. I'll be very happy if you do. Your ocs are fun and you put a lot of love and care into the canon characters you write. I think you add a lot to the community.

Sethy: I didn't know it for a while but back in the Fate community I followed your arknights blog and admired you there. I'm super glad I have gotten the opportunity to meet you and to become your friend. I think that all the things you do are so cool. Like you're a vtuber that's incredible. I always wanted to stream but could never work up the courage. You also know the creators of all the walfas I love. I just think its so cool. You have such a history within the community. I know that you suffered a very bad tragedy this year. I don't believe I was in a good enough headspace at that time to have provided you with the support a friend should have given and I deeply regret that. I just hope you're doing well.

Noka: I think you're a real sweetie and also really funny. I'm glad to see you posting on your sfw blog a lot more again because I really love seeing you on my dash. I'm hoping that we can do a lot more threads in the future because its always fun to write our muses together.

Minnie: Maybe the only person with the same brain worms as me. I know that lately we have not talked much but I hope you are doing well. I just wanna say that I really love your art.

Aurora: My apprentice and buddy, hehe. I know I haven't been around much but I want you to know that I'm glad you decided to join the rpc. You're so full of ideas and kindhearted. You have such phenomenal oc ideas and have such a talent for making danmaku. I think someday you may be the centerpiece of the community.

Sats: We haven't spoken too often but like Amber you were one of the first folks to interact with me in the community. Alongside that I find your writing to be phenomenal. As are your headcanons. The work that you put in to research, especially on folklore, is just so inspirational. It drives me to want to learn everything I can.

Momi: Hey Momi. It's been a while since you've been around and I miss you a lot. I know we still message on discord occasionally so its not like I can't reach out to ya. But I just miss you being in the rpc a lot. You were such a great writer and always doing something fun. But I imagine you've got a whole bunch of difficult challenges ahead of you. I've heard the career you're pursuing is really rough. I hope that you're thriving in it though.

Sarience: You've always been a good pal to me. I have a lot of fun writing with Neka in both forms as well as your other muses. There's a lot of asks from you I haven't answered yet. I'm really sorry about that. It feels disrespectful. Still I hope to be able to do more in the future. Thank you for always being interested in interacting with my muses, even when I was very new and unestablished.

Kyo: I really really like everytime that I see you on my dash. You write your muses in such a fun and engaging way. I hope that we get to interact a lot more in the future. I also know you've started something new in the last few months, not gonna be specific since I'm not sure if you've shared that part of your personal life on Tumblr, but I wish you the best of luck at it. I think you're going to succeed hard!

Ran: Ran I guess I just first wanna say I consider you a really good and special friend. When we've spoken you've often alluded to social anxiety and feeling like you've said embarassing things. So I want to restate that I've never been put off by what you've said and I love talking to you. As well as roleplaying and doing boardgames. I have so much fun pairing our muses up our causing wacky hijinks. I haven't seen you on your blogs much lately. Maybe I've just missed you but if not I hope you return to the rpc soon. It's not the same place without you.

Metal: You've been a long time friend to me by this point. Longer than a lot of folks on this list. I really appreciate that a lot. We haven't talked too much lately but I hope you're doing well. I also know not all of our fandoms sync up but I'm always down to interact anyways.

Nep: Hey Nep I haven't really seen you on Tumblr lately. I'm hoping that's just because we've been active at different times but if not I hope you're back soon. If you're not, I hope you're happy wherever you are. I think that you're real fun to write with and you've got original characters I'm excited to do much more with. I also believe that you had an event while I was gone that I'll hopefully be able to catch up on sometime soon.

Koi: I know I've not been around much lately but I hope that you're doing well. I've not really been in the headspace for horror lately but you're very good at bringing a unique horror flair to things.

Plumber: Hey we don't really personally know each other all that well but you're always making fun and wacky posts that I love to see on my dash. It feels like the rpc would be a lot less fun without you here. You also seem to be an incredibly kind person.

Kaali: A friend I've had for quite a while now but that I don't talk to enough. Sorry about that I'm just genuinely not the best with conversations. I have mad respect for all the work you put into your original characters and into your ideas. Like you really pull out all the stops.

Awoo: I've admired your ability to create interesting and fun original characters a lot. Several decisions I've made to develop my skills as a roleplayer have been inspired by you. I know you've had some mental health struggles of your own and I haven't heard from you lately so I hope you're doing alright wherever you are.

Sades: During some really difficult moments you were there for me when not many other people were. I'm always going to appreciate that. You're also the reason I got into Touhou. Which means that without you, chances are I woule not have met the vast majority of people here or found a community where I feel I belong.

Cobalt: I am always ecstatic when I see your posts on my dash. I love your Chen and think that you're a lot of fun. I have not been around much but when I have been I've seen you talking about things like not feeling you have much to do in the community. I can't make decisions for you but I do want to say that I think you are a fundamental piece of our rpc. I would be sad not having you here.

Teeps: I was shy about approaching you at first but you're incredibly cool. A lot of the fandoms you are in I'm not in but your posts get me interested in them anyways. Like I have no clue who that green sonic character is but you give her such an energy. I'm real glad to know ya. As far as the 2hu rpc goes you've been around a lot longer than me and I love hearing your own personal that you've developed.

Cait: I need to pop in and catch your streams more. I think that you're very cool to see on the dash. I especially love the way that you write your Sakuya. I really cherrish her interactions with my Reimu.

Sev: First of all. A while ago you sent me a very kind message wishing me well in my mental health struggles. I was not in the best place then so I did not appropriately respond. So thank you for that it truly meant a lot to me. I believe that you put a stunning amount of work into the characters you write, giving them so much detail and layers. Its inspiring and I just really want to appreciate you for it.

Hanafuda: You haven't been around much and last we spoke you alluded to a rough spot. So I hope if you ever see this that you're doing well. It was always fun having another Miko on the dash for mine to banter with. I also looked forward to seeing more of the other muses you played. Maybe someday you'll return.

Frozen: Everytime I see one of your posts it makes me smile. Honestly you've got some of the funniest jokes in the fandom. Some I don't get but I still feel they'd be hilarious if I got them. Also I have noticed you often commission art for other people. I find that to be a very sweet and kindhearted thing. So I consider you to be the heart of the community.

Fox: I don't know you very well but I've recently seen your multimuse popping up and it seems very fun. So I want to get to know ya in the future.

Chiru: We've not really spoken but I think you make some really great posts. Very well written headcanons and roleplays. So I just wanna say I'm always happy seeing you on my dash.

Draco: you're not in the touhou fanbase but you have been a long time friend. I haven't heard much from you lately so I hope you're doing well. I'm here if ya need me.

Sturm: I think that all your fairy posts are incredibly. You truly are a star of my dashboard. Hopefully someday we'll interact more. I'd like that.

Xana: You seem to have so much lore for your blogs, its really cool. It seems you've been around a long while so there's a lot of history. Someday I'd like to sit down and hear all about it from you. I also find your writing to be quite fun.

Jacob: we don't interact too much but I'm always excited to see someone posting walfas images. So that has always made you stick out in my dash and brighten it. Hope you're doing well.

Geisthonoredferry: As of yet, I don't believe we've interacted. But you're always liking my posts thst's something I really appreciate. Hopefully sometime I can get to know your oc.

Carp: Last I saw you were in a rough spot so I hope things are well now. You're newer to my dash but you seem very kind hearted and jovial. Also your ocs sre red as hell and go've got good face claim tastes.

Crim: You're a real cool friend with a lot of cool ideas. I love any interactions that our muses have together. Although my favorite is Kutaka/Eiki because it's somehow both a very obvious ship and yet a rare one. I think that they are very cute together. I also like the sisterhood of Reimu and Kisume. It's an unexpected but fun dynamic.

Mugenri-mun: I don't believe I know your screen name but you've been real supportive of me through my hardship and gave me a person to speak to. I would not be in as good a place without you. Also I'm glad someone is repping Len'en.

Kcmeiji & Closedheartedgirl: I wanted to note you both as you are both Komeiji blogs thay popped up and then disappeared while I've been got on hiatus. I just think that's a bit disappointing. The Komeiji are some of my favorites.

That's about all I have to say. It was kind of tough to word it all out but those are things I want y'all to know.

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

hi! feel free to disregard this if you feel its an intrusive question or you just wish not to respond.

i saw your response on the post about adhd reward systems and was intruiged and a bit inspired/validated/something. im an undergrad psych/human dev student right now aiming to get a msw and clinical license to do therapy and i struggle with managing my adhd for more than a couple months at a time quite a bit. i often question whether or not i will be able to be in any helping profession due to not feeling like i can manage my own functioning issues. it feels contradictory to me to imagine therapists (and especially possible future me as an lcsw) struggling with anything while still being good therapists. though i know logically that everyone struggles with things from time to time, it feels like one might feel unqualified to help others if they are not able to manage their own issues all of the time.

i was wondering if you had any wisdom about reconciling these things as a therapist with adhd. i was very interested in what you shared about how you manage days when you are having a harder time.

Awwww, rats hun, I'm sorry that you've been worrying about this! I really want to encourage you to reach out off Anon, cuz I'd love to chat more, one social worker to another 💚

That said, I'm gonna try and respond to your ask here as best I can!

First off, it's not too intrusive a question (for me) at all! I try to be really open about certain things in my life, and tend not to reference something on here I'm not comfortable talking more about. Even if it did feel intrusive, I'd answer what I *was* comfy with and declined to comment on the rest.

As for needing to have your own house in order to be able to help others, I mean....yeah, to some extent. But you're a human being, and so are the people on the other side of the chair, and we all benefit from learning how to fuck up safely and come back from that so like. I don't subscribe to the idea that therapists need to be flawless people. There are absolutely things to be attentive to/cautious about (including how we are impacting the person, the space, and the conversation, etc) but I've actually developed BETTER dynamics with clients who let me know I did something they didn't like or that hurt them, and being able to move forward together with a plan to better protect their boundaries in the space. And if the parts of you that you're worried about is outside the space, well. That's why most therapists have therapists. To process, reflect, and monitor ourselves for warning signs that we're sliding outside our boundaries. No one is perfectly under control all the time.

And with ADHD specifically, one of the biggest things people need and deserve access to is the safety to fail, the safety to drop habits and have to pick them back up after things pile up, the safety to not feel ashamed of their experience of the world. Without the active work of unwinding those feelings of shame, behavioral tools/accommodations are often a lot less effective for us. And for a demographic that specifically struggles with emotional security/consistency, that's often an intense process for us to go through. Knowing other people we perceive as successful and thriving may ALSO experience similar cycles and needs to us. If clients genuinely think therapists are perfect, it's easy for those of us on the other side of the chair to let the shame evolve into comparison as a way to self-blame for our perceived failure.

I got my ADHD diagnosis part way through my MSW, and didn't get medicated for it until after I had graduated. I was uhhhhhhhh

Obsessive. About my routines, my organization, my back up plans, all of it. It was hard to believe I could function if I wasn't meeting everyone's expectations all the time. But it's unsustainable. It **can't** last forever. Especially when everything is just. So overwhelming all the time.

So I definitely don't want you to think that the only way to get to your clinical license is to demand that you always operate at 100% capacity in order to justify not be flawless. A lot of us carry that burden with us well into adulthood, and truly? It's the other way around. The more comfort, ease of access to resources, and sense of security we have in our lives, the better we're able to make our way towards patterns that work for us.

I don't want to give the impression that the specifics of my coping strategies are A) comprehensively effective, and/or B) universally applicable. So I'm gonna kinda stick with the underlying philosophy.

Essentially, one of the most important things is that any strategies I rely on are capable of being picked back up without judgement or major disruption. So for example, I keep a daybook calendar. It was recommended by another ADHDer as an effective way of visualizing and navigating executive dysfunction. It's divided up into days, weeks, months, and quarter years. Most importantly, it's undated. I have had this (and been using the exact same) daybook for over 2yrs. Periodically, I lose momentum for days, weeks, or even months. But when I finally get back the bandwidth to pick it back up, all I have to do is turn to a new week and date it for my current week. I just picked back up yesterday after not using it since last summer lmao

There's this concept in behavioral training for dogs called "no failure" where essentially (deeply simplified!!!) you always mark and reward whatever positive behaviors you get from the dog as a process of positive reinforcement of what you want from them. And while you wouldn't reward unsafe or inappropriate behavior from the dog, the second they redirect, no matter what they were doing a minute ago, you mark and reward.

I've been training my dogs this way for a good 5-6yrs now, and everywhere they go people will hunt me down to ask me how I get them to be so polite and responsive.

People aren't dogs, obvi, but this positive reinforcement process still functions similarly. So like, when I work with kids and families on "behavior issues" I get families to like. Essentially remove proactive consequences. Natural consequences happen, because that's life, but you still shouldn't abandon them to figuring out a solution on their own. It's a lot of modeling, marking, and rewarding, and a lot of repetitive and continuous conversations about why certain rules exist or why certain expectations are had, etc. An example here might be a "behavior chart" with tiered rewards. Each day that behavior is in line with safety and meeting needs, you mark and reward it. Every week that this is true for all 7 days, you mark and reinforce with a slightly more valuable reward. And on top of that, you have "high value" rewards for cumulative successes. If you hit 28 days of success (even if they're not consecutive, rather intermittent with non-marked days across like. 3 months or whatever) the reinforcement reward has been earned and that's that.

Partially, this process helps reframe dysregulation from "failure" to "interruption." And partially, this ensures that every success builds on previous successes, making it easier to remember backwards that good and bad days both happen, even when we have a hard time remembering what "not now" feels like.

Everything I build for myself is like that. No failure, mark and reinforce. Sometimes I do it for myself, sometimes my wife helps me, and sometimes I learn to arrange positive and affirming natural consequences of my choices. It just sort of depends what makes the most sense.

Another pillar of the underlying philosophy here is that eveything is contextual. Any change in the circumstances might change how our needs around that circumstance presents. So if a strategy or tool isn't working anymore, it's not because I've failed, it's because something about my physical and/or emotional landscape has changed since the last time I sat with myself about what helps me function. Maybe it's a temporary change (just for the day cuz I'm tired or sick for example), or maybe it's long term (when we moved to the city it became important for me to get regular, intentional sunlight because if I wasn't proactive about it, I would isolate indoors and struggle more for example), but whichever it is, all that matters is that I acknowledge what's changed about my needs without judgement or self-shaming. It's a *straightforward* process, but certainly not an easy or time-sensitive process.

Anyway, hun, you're still in your undergrad. I absolutely ASSURE you, you will not be the same person by the time you graduate from your master's. It's like stone going through pressure and heat. *Something* is always gonna change. So cut yourself a lil slack about where you are now. You aren't pressed for time, I promise.

[hannieehaee]

Idk if this is appropriate or not (feel free if this is something you don't want to answer) but as a casual kpop stan who really only stans seventeen and listens to other kpop artists on a somewhat frequent basis I just feel as though seventeen is reaching their peak in a way that's far from satisfying. Like idk if this makes sense but to me it seems as tho the members are struggling to keep out of "scandals" with mingyu's incident last year, minghao/seoksoon being labeled as fat phobic earlier this year over out of context clips and now with Joshua (he's not even close to being my favorite member but these rumors and pregnancy stories are honestly making me so upset rn) ...as a fan who feels a genuine attachment to these people it's hard for me to be happy because while Ik the boys deserve every good thing coming their way fame comes with a price and that price is what I'm worried about. Like I get that Pledis isn't SM and seventeen definitely see themselves as family unlike NCT who view themselves more as colleagues I'm so scared that Joshua will eventually leave like Lucas or heaven forbid anything more drastic happens. It's just that I always see these "we could never save them" posts but then the same people who post them also comment the worst things forgetting that idols are humans too. I'm super sorry for the long ask but I just read that jeonghan got hurt and that made me think of the rest of the members and everything else they've been going thru. I'm not even the type of person to get attached to people I barely know but with Seventeen it's like I'm really and honestly praying for their success because they seem that THAT genuine group of people who are just trying their best. Sorry for the rambling

i get what ur saying. dont worry abt sending a long ask! ur welcome to rant abt svt in my inbox whenever! honestly i havent stanned for too long so idk how things were before this past year but i do worry for them lately :/ theyre getting injured too often and they get no rest. i dont like how pledis/hybe are managing them at all. theyve been constantly touring japan very repeatedly for seemingly no good reason at all which has obviously tired them out (theyve been dropping like flies, LITERALLY). pledis had the opportunity to promote them in ways that didnt involve constant performances but have just chosen not to for some reason. i really hope they get to rest soon (unlikely tho since theyre likely gonna have a world tour next year).

about the joshua thing. i feel sosososo bad for him. idk and idc if hes really dating that girl honestly. i do feel like it was kinda dumb of her to consistently post herself in the same places/clothes as him if they really wanted to keep it a secret BUT neither of them deserved the hate/scrutiny they got for it. not even with the pregnancy thingy on her stories. i don't think joshua and lucas' situations are comparable whatsoever since joshua has not done anything wrong unlike lucas. im hoping pledis somehow protects him better but thats unlikely. i dont think any member of svt will ever leave bc as u said, theyre family. cant rlly compare to nct tho lol bc i only stan svt so idk any other groups' dynamics like that. i do get what ur saying tho i have friends who stan nct and svt and theyve said to me that they do see a drastic difference in dynamics between the two groups but thats neither here nor there.

lastly, i have the best hopes for svt. they keep saying theyll only go up from here and i believe that. idk how that will play out with military service in consideration or with what seems to be chronic incidents that keep happening to them (gyu, cheol, and han in the past few months) but i trust and hope they'll be okay. they have a very established fanbase and a rlly good support group with one another so i only see good things for them in the future. hope they get at least a month off soon though.

[silver-heller]

So um, I've been vaguely informed (the details aren't really my business) there's been a situation so I just want to clarify something:

My vent posts are just that, vent posts. They're not me making an educated callout on an individual and they shouldn't be seen as THIS PERSON IS JUST A TERRIBLE PERSON AND HERE'S THE 100% LOGICAL REASONS WHY. I only put it in caps to clarify I think that's how I came off, my vents don't reflect how I actually see people, they reflect how I see people in that hurt state.

Does that justify not adding clarity to begin with? No, and I will definitely do so in the future, but I feel clarifying now is better than just leaving this confusion in the air. So here it is.

I will be more careful in the future that my vents don't breach containment, I tried to be clear the goal was not harassment and I do genuinely feel bad that apparently someone saw and took it as quite genuine. In this situation, it was less about the person and more a trend of people accidentally making a character's "evil side" into an alter like entity because they think it's cute, funny, or hot. People are often way more willing to accept that than actual system relationships.

It ended up hitting on a sour spot because for a long time I've had a deep and extremely important relationship with an alter of mine, but I'd constantly worried due to the nature of said alter, it would be heavily judged and not as accepted as if I just saw him as a fictional character. This is not a justification, but an explanation for the layers of hurt on top of it being a very bad stereotype. The fact I haven't been more open about the relationship is on me, and you know what? I should be, even if others will look down on me for it. That's their damage.

I can't speak for the original intent of the user I was venting about, and I should have been clear I was reacting to how it all came across rather than knowing their full intent. Which yes, it came across really bad but, people make mistakes. People get scared and do dumb things. It happens, so again, should have been clear their intent was unknown, it just came off bad in a way that made me feel like I had to block to protect myself.

I'm not going to tell you not to "tattle" on me. That's really 100% up to you, but I do ask you to keep in mind the point of my vent posts before you do. Cause yeah, me venting because I am upset or triggered or what the Hell ever is going to sound really bad, but if you asked me once the dust was settled I'd probably just say, "yeah that user made a mistake, and it was enough to deeply hurt me to the point I don't want to talk to them anymore. I don't think they're a bad person, I just don't want them in my space to avoid future issues". But, next time I will try to cool down and be more open about my process, as I realize how bad some of the things I said sound.

I shouldn't have painted them as a bad moot, I should have just explained I didn't think they were very conscious of the fact I was plural, so I wanted to be more careful about moots from now on to ensure that part is understood loud and clear in ALL its regards before I accidentally put myself in (unintentionally) triggering spaces.

So uh, if it wasn't clear please don't harrass this person. Also please don't judge my friends for just trying to be supportive. Most of them only vaguely knew about the situation and only two of us were involved. They were responding to what they knew at the time and were extremely protective due to the hurt I was feeling.

I'm gonna try to make this the last post I make about this, but I just genuinely never meant to hurt anyone so I wanted to say my peace.

[hgejfmw-hgejhsf]

Weekend WIP Game

Rules: List your WIPs below (if you only write one fic at a time, feel free to include future WIPs/ideas!) then answer the following questions. Then, tag as many people as you have WIPs (or more).

Thanks to @kiwiana-writes @daisymae-12 and @whimsymanaged for the tag!

1. WIP List:

5 Times Alex & Henry had sex anywhere on the property they want + 1 Time they walk through Austin holding hands

The Super Six try a period simulator

Alex POV - Get Low NYE (movie-verse)

Come Back to Me

Henry POV - Post Email Leak

You're still just a dream

Big Brother AU (collab with @thinkof-england)

Saw AU

Henry/Gabby horseback riding

Henry Mozart Quote

2. Which of your WIPs is currently the longest? You're still just a dream because it's the only one that's actually finished that I just haven't posted.

3. Which WIP do you expect will end up the longest? I'm gonna guess that Big Brother will probably end up the longest because my cowriter is going to help me finally embrace the multichap life.

4. Which WIP is your favourite to write/the most enjoyable to write? Why? I'm SO excited to write the 5+1. I love reclaiming the lake house, and this will be another way for Alex and Henry to do that!

5. Which WIP do you find the most intimidating to write? Why? Big Brother is intimidating to me because it's been SO long since I've watched the show, but I'm so excited about it, and I have my cowriter to fill in the blanks!

6. Which WIP do you experience the most self-doubt about. Why? You're still just a dream. I've been sitting on this completed fic for...awhile. But there's this mental obstacle I can't jump over when posting it. It's my interpretation of Alex and Henry becoming parents.

7. Which of your WIPs will you seek out a beta/sensitivity reader for? Why? I'll probably have another person read through You're still just a dream before I finally end up posting.

8. Have any of your WIPs been struck by the curse of writer's block? Come Back to Me because I had to stop it for the fest, but now I can't seem to get back into the headspace.

9. Which WIP has your favourite OC? Tell us about them? You're still just a dream is the only one that has an established OC so far, Alex and Henry's baby girl Gabby.

10. Which WIP is the sexiest? The 5+1 is going to be a fun one to write.

11. Which WIP is the angstiest? Henry's POV fic. It's going to probably be a short little guy, but it's already angsty AF.

12. Which WIP has the best characterisation (in your humble opinion)? This question is way too hard for me to answer because so many of them are just ideas haha.

13. Which WIP has the best scene setting (in your humble opinion)? I'm hoping the Saw AU will be the best scene setter *winks*

14. Which WIP have you worked the hardest on? You're still just a dream has a lot of hours of work and hours of thought and worry.

15. Which WIP do you have the highest expectations for? Why? I think the Big Brother AU is going to be pretty big...pun not intended but accepted happily.

16. Do you dream about any of your WIPs? Way too often. And I never remember the dreams in the morning.

17. Do any of your WIPs have particular complexities that your other fics don't? The Saw AU is going to come with some complexities, I'm sure. It hasn't been started, just thought about haha. And of course, Big Brother comes with its own set of rules!

18. Which WIP is the funniest or has the most humour? The Super Six taking on the period simulator is going to be ridiculous and amazing.

19. Do any of your WIPs contain outside POVs or a deep dive on a character other than the main ship? How are you finding that process? So far I don't know that I'm diving super deep into any characters outside the main ship, but Big Brother is going to absolutely flesh out a bunch of them in a special way!

20. Tell us one thing we don't know about one or more of your WIPs. Come Back to Me is going to be my first ever songfic!

Here's a few tags (not as many as I have WIPs I'm sorry)! @heybuddy-drabbles @happiness-of-the-pursuit @affectionatelyrs @oneofthewednesdays @noahreids @littlemisskittentoes